First dates are usually a mixture of excitement, curiosity, and some panic. Aside from wondering if the other person will like you or not, you also have to figure out if you even want them to like you and if you’re interested in them at all. And sometimes you simply don’t know how to behave or what to say. So, here are some tips for a successful first date.
It’s OK to be nervous
Preparing for a first date can be very stressful. You’re not sure what to wear, you don’t want to seem too eager and arrive too early and you’re worried about saying something inappropriate. Well, that’s perfectly normal. Your date is probably going through the same thing. The good news is that the panic and nervousness will pass as soon as the date begins and you start talking to each other. Plus, admitting you’re nervous can be a sort of an ice-breaker. Of course, don’t make your whole date about how you feel, but turn the conversation towards getting to know the other person and let them get to know you.
The outfit for your first date should complement your looks yet allow you to feel comfortable and relaxed. Take your time to try on several combinations, but a good idea might be to wear a color or an outfit that people have complemented before. Avoid wearing anything too tight or heels that are too high for you, since you risk looking ridiculous fighting for breath or not being able to make three steps in the shoes you’ve chosen. Furthermore, when opting for an outfit, bear in mind the place and time of the date. You don’t want to wear an elegant gown with a lot of jewelry and heavy makeup to have a cup of coffee at your local café in the middle of the day.
Feel free to have an opinion
When choosing where and when to meet, don’t be afraid to say you disagree with your date’s choice. Mind you, they’re probably just suggesting a place and time and there are other options available. If you can’t think of what to do or where to go on your first date, you can always find some helpful date ideas online. There’s no need for you to attend a heavy metal concert or eat Indian food if you don’t enjoy these things. Both of you should feel comfortable on your first date, so simply find a solution that will suit both of you. Besides, you wouldn’t want somebody to say yes to your ideas just to please you and then hate the date you’ve planned from the very beginning.
If you’re unsure how to greet your date when you see them, some basic guidelines would be to rely on your feeling. First of all, be punctual, and don’t keep your date waiting for you to show up, wondering if they’re being stood up. A ‘hello’ and a polite hug would be appropriate, along with a kiss on the cheek. Sticking to a handshake is probably reserved for blind dates and is considered a bit too formal, but if you don’t feel comfortable enough for a hug, it will have to do. It’s still considered more gentlemanly for men to pick up their date, rather than meeting them at the restaurant or the bar. Furthermore, giving an honest compliment to your date is a polite thing to do and will make her (or him) feel better about themselves. Men and women both spend a lot of time getting ready for their dates, so somebody noticing the effort and the final result can make anybody feel nice.
Keep the conversation flowing
There’s nothing worse than a one-way conversation, so don’t let that happen. When asked a question, don’t just say yes or no. Answer the questions honestly, but don’t go into too much detail, since talking about yourself extensively can make you look self-centered and uninterested in your date. So, after answering their question, ask one yourself. Ask them about their favorite food, sports or places, but avoid talking about politics, religion, your salaries or ex partners. Also, keep your phone in your pocket and only use it in case of an emergency. Checking your social network accounts or chatting with somebody online while your date is sitting across the table from you is extremely rude, which is not the impression you want to make.
As far as first dates are concerned, don’t worry if yours wasn’t perfect. They almost never are. Making a mistake here or there is acceptable, so relax and enjoy getting to know somebody new and interesting.